The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize
