It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Randomize