it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
We need to rekindle our bromance
No more Irish car bombs ever.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
I came so hard my ears popped.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
