It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
