Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
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