when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
