dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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