The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Randomize
