god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
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