I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
Randomize
