Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
i don't like sucking hair
i just had sex bonerless
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
