I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Randomize
