R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
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