Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
