is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize