Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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