jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
