And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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