Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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