Have you finally orgasmed yet?
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize