i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Girls should come with a carfax report
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I just had sex on a roof
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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