Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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