I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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