that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize