it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Randomize
