I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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