2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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