If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize