he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Randomize
