she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
No subtext here. People are naked.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Randomize
