There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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