Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize