the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
im six kinds of drunk right now
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
