If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize