Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize