haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Randomize
