Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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