Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
