dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
