READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
