You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize