I wish they made helmets for livers.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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