Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
where am i from again
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Randomize
