'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
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