I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
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