aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
