in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
