Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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