it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
you're hired as official boob wrangler
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize
