So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Randomize
