quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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