they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Randomize