careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
